April 2012
14 posts
Top Five: Things I Was Gonna Do with That $640...
hungrylikekevin:
1. Buy and sell human souls, not for any nefarious purpose, but just to say that I have.
2. Take a shit in every 5-star hotel in Europe.
3. Transsexual porn star Areeya.
4. Buy a small island nation, declare it legal to fuck in public, spend the rest of my life looking out the window of my governor’s palace with my dick in my hand.
5. Money suit. Money top hat. Money spats....
Woman: Can I have birth control?
Government: No.
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
Government: No.
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Government: No.
Woman: Well, why can't I have birth control?
Government: Because. Sex isn't for recreation. It's for procreation.
Woman: But it can help regulate my period and benefit me in other ways.
Government: Too bad.
Man: For no reason other than for recreational sex, may I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Man: YES, YES I DO!!
Government: WELL HOWDY, VALID CITIZEN. You can buy condoms by the dozens. Here, here's a pack of special condom for "His Pleasure." Oooh, these come in different colours and flavours. Here, try these. They have ribs on them. And this one glows in the dark!! LOL OMG DICK LIGHTSABER!!
Government: But seriously, you're a man. You can do what ever you want.
Woman: But-
Government: Shut up, you sinning, freeloading hussy.
//Yep, that's about how it is.
March 2012
36 posts
2 tags
did i really just make one LOL
action-doctor:
morphinekai:
gothikka01:
theclairecreature:
starsinthegutter:
weirdchildofpoe:
cocorosalie:
the-milk-eyed-mender:
history1970s:
REBLOG WITH YOUR ANIMU SELF
im tsundere
i have bad taste in cosmetic
admittedly i had fun with that.
I enjoy this<3
If the hair was longer, it would be more dead on hha. But more or less, I look like this ^_^
...
3 tags
5 tags
10 Ways to Piss Off a Pagan
(This was originally an image, but I didn’t feel like re-making it/zooming in, so I figured I would text-post it!)
10. Ask if they are Satan worshippers.
9. Be considerate- rearrange their altar so it will look neat.
8. Blow out their altar candle if it is still daylight. (No need to waste a good candle!)
7. Pick up their stones and gems for a closer look.
6. Sharpen their dull,...
4 tags
Watchemwolfilie:
Watch and let your mind be at ease. It is truly cosmic.
ARE YOU A WIZARD?!
3 tags
Watchkrxs10:
SAY NO TO BULLYING
FINAL-FUCKING-LY they make a real ass movie about it.
WATCH THIS MOVIE WHEN IT IS RELEASED.
And I say this- if you’re a bully- if you’re going to pick on someone because they’re different or smaller or whatever- I’ll kick YOUR ass. Don’t fuck with people.
5 tags
3 tags
8 tags
5 tags
5 tags
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3 tags
My Ultimate Country Playlist!
So, I love me some country music. I just can’t stand the uber-pop pseudo country (Sugarland, etc.). So, if you’re feeling good and want some quality country music, here’s a playlist to download:
Would You Go With Me- Josh Turner
You’re My Better Half- Keith Urban
Ours- Taylor Swift
Red Dirt Road- Brooks & Dunn
Rock My World (Little Country Girl)- Brooks & Dunn
...
4 tags
4 tags
sharinganblossom:
juchepresident:
i want someone to follow rick santorum around everywhere and say “no” in a really stern voice every time he tries to speak
So accurate.
